Last night, my husband and I took chairs out on our back porch and watched lightening dance across the Oklahoma sky. Sitting on our porch during thunderstorms has sort of become our "thing". Some may call us crazy, but we don't particularly care!
As we gazed at the sky and listened to the soothing rain, it became so incredibly clear just how little time we have left together before he leaves. We made a verbal list of all the last minute necessary errands and tasks left to be done. It's painful discussing details like bank accounts, wills, insurance policies and the like. But even more painful is discussing how our children will handle 12 months away from their father.
Bryanna is old enough that she understands that Daddy's leaving for Honduras - but she has absolutely no concept of time. So when she says he's going for a year, there's no indication she truly comprehends how long that is. Izaiah is young, only 18 months. I think he will notice that Daddy is not around, but for the most part he will remain unphased.
During the day yesterday Brandon got out his big green bag and started stuffing it with uniforms and the necessities. Bryanna has already made arrangements for Brandon to take her favorite stuffed animal, a dog (which has recording and play-back capabilities). It was hard to watch her try several times to put her dog into Daddy's bag. She was heart-broken to think that he would leave without it, but she didn't understand that he wasn't leaving yet, just packing. I fought back tears several times yesterday.
Now, it's Wednesday. Tomorrow will be our last full day here as a family of 4. Friday afternoon we will leave our home and make the trip to Oklahoma City and stay with his parents until he flies out. I'm trying my best to make the most of every second together without overwhelming him. Yesterday after he packed his bags, he was very quiet. He finally admitted that the reality of this duty station was beginning to sink in. He kissed me gently and said "I'm really gonna miss you Momma."
I'm really gonna miss you too, Baby.
For tonight - A Mommy in Jeans and High Heels